Disastrous me

Ik besloot om een dagboek bij te houden, online. In het engels want ik heb niks beters te doen.

Dear diary,

I am scared asf. Why?
- I tried to gain magic powers while I believe in God... I feel like I betrayed God, but magical powers is something I want all my life. Magic has enchanted me...

- I am in love but don't want to admit it to myself nor to anyone... ugh its so stupid that i like that man... I was thinking for like 4 fking years that he was really really really annoying. Now he turns out to be cute i'm flippin. He said to a friend of mine that he won't ever leave me... I think he is just kidding but idk for sure. I wish i knew for sure

>He just does something what my heart makes go BOOM BOOM.
I should give in but i'm too scared because a few months ago something happened. My friend and i apped him together with a kind of joke thing that he should ask me out. He said he liked me a lot but wasn't really in love ANYONE, WHAT THE HECCCKK does he mean by that. Cuz right now he's acting like he likes me more than a lot but he rejected me back then. I'm scared stiff but still in love.

XOXO- jk