I Can Truly Say I Can't Stand Myself...

My friend tells me she thinks it's BDD. I don't know, and I don't want to. My parents already yell at me for telling them I know something is wrong with me.

I will stare at a mirror for ann hour, just pointing out the wrong things with myself. I have so many freckles. And my chin is like, protruding from my face... it's like giant... I NEVER leave my house with out a LOT of make up on... and I never post any pictures of myself, unless I edit them A LOT.

My boyfriend says he doesn't understand it. My friends say I look pretty. I don't believe them and they know it. I am scared they are just with me because they feel bad for me...

I am just really really reallly grotesque, basically.


I know it's shallow to only focus on my face, but I can't help it, I get self conscience even if I'm home alone with no make up.

And I am grounded from make up, so that DOES NOT help at all.