Life.

There's been times in life were you seem everything is okay. but in reality this world is just a big ass fuck up in life. literally it mind fucks everyone and anyone who is in it and trying to come in this world.there's times you sit on the couch on a saturday or sunday morning watching the perfect families on the perfect television screen.
Stop acting like life is a movie. when all you see out in this world is a fucked up society where everyone is just append them self and no one else.
This isnt even about you and the perfect life you though you'd have as a child. You grow up with some fuck up shit a perfect fam. with a shitty house. shitty life. Or you grow up with a Shitty house with a wonderful family but yet can't afford your shit for school.
In my situation , it was having a home my father working his ass off for us but we & he had a pretty damn life. Financially. But yet i was the middle child always abused my own mother. i feel like i wasn't wanted by her, i was a fuck up on her life even now. im still nothing to her yet she hasn't hit me over in years but yet im still a pathetic loser to her. never graduated and making my own life full of art. Her response never in life will you think you'll go far with that shit. Now, to me she's a MURDERER not physically but MENTALLY ! She has killed me mentally. knowing what can hurt me inside. Now i hardly have any hope. Her pleasure is to see me fuck up in life while other siblings are making it tot the top. man i'd says shes a clown ! Never had a role model but it seems i only look up to my self. friends came and went. Never stay along this world you may call. but yet, i'm not mad, i know one day i'll make it to the top with out any help. Im independent no female role model or male. But if anything i'd thank God keeping me as strong as i am.