the darknes consumes us all...but now death callin

the darkness is closin in around me i cant tell if its me startin to pass out from the vodka or its from the gashes in between my ribs and on my legs. I think i finally did it...goodbye world my only regret is that you were so cruel. Well here i come alicia bri and aaron you will no longer be alone in the dark space in between hevean and hell. You dont have to hide i new all along
goodbye people thank you for makin the trip easier for me and keegan u can stay with her just hope that it was worth me doing this

Ftw :), vrouw, 29 jaar

• ashlie cae woensdag 04 januari 2012 08:38
  OMGEEEEE im callin an ambulance ill be over in a min if that :0
• Ingrain (opgeheven op 13-9-2015) woensdag 04 januari 2012 12:03
  This sounds as fake as when my mum would say she's full Dutch.
  I'm sorry, but from someone that actually DID try to kill herself 3
  times and almost succeeded twice, this is BULL. SIMPLY because
  if you actually wanted to kill yourself, you would not write it
  down on a thing like mydiary nor anywhere else on the web.
  You would simply do it.
  
  And another one, if you're about to die, how come you can walk up
  to your computer and write something so obviously written for attention?
  a normal human being would either talk to themselves and stay
  on the ground not moving at-all, or would freak out cause it was an accident
  and call an ambulance, or better, a person he or she thrusts.
  
  A REAL suicidal person, would either plan it, and leave a note, in which they
  don't tell how they will die so they will not be saved in time, or just
  do it, like my nephew did. He closed all openings in the bathroom, and let
  the hot water run. He died because the moiste took all the oxygen from the
  room, leaving him to suffocate alone.
  
  I myself, cut my wrists, and was found in time,
  then tried to hang myself, but I was afraid of the pain,
  and then I drowned myself, successfully. My heart stopped for 52 seconds.
  
  So, coming from someone who HAS actually been there, STOP this
  nonesence. Cause honestly, right now you're insulting many people with
  your little attention scam.
  
  
  
  Ashlie Cae, if you find her bullshitting with just a few minor scratches you
  TELL HER this is bullshit. Many thanks.
• Ingrain (opgeheven op 13-9-2015) woensdag 04 januari 2012 12:13
  And last but not least, you're 16.
  Come back when you're 21 and your COMPLETE family has left you,
  you have no friends to turn to, the boyfriend you have at that time
  beats the living daylights out of you, when you have no job, no
  money, and no one left that even wants to save you.
  
  Until that time, live with your heart broken. I have to live with mine
  every single day, dying every morning and every night, with no end
  to it. But one day, someone will come and save me, and take all that
  pain away. Until then, I'll be a loner and waiting on my own.
  
  But I will never, EVER, believe death is the better option, again. No boy
  or girl is worth taking your life for. Even if you think so now, I'm sorry
  to be harsh, but, come on. Stop pretending killing yourself is your next
  move cause I can see right through you, even when there's an
  internet cable between us. HE chose someone else, well, let him have
  that girl, find that she's not enough for him, let him cheat, destroy
  everything, and come back crying. Then it is your turn to block him,
  delete his name and call him a freaking idiot for not taking you when
  he could. So STOP moaning, this is ridiculous.
• ashlie cae woensdag 04 januari 2012 15:09
  wow REALLY?! MY FRIEND tried her hardest kill herself....and she has a internet phone she did it cuz she wanted everyone of her on there to know why she did it cuz if she did actually write a note then she wuld be wasting her time bcuz her parents wuldnt tell a living soul about it. If she didnt put that on her she wuld be at her funeral tomorrow and no one wuld evver know that she died becuz her parents dont bleave in others being there for a non family member....so dont be commenting talking shit becuz you dont no jack shit if ur saying this is all for attention. I agree that she shuldn of done it for keegan but still she REALLY tried to commit it. And if it sounds so fake to you then just dont read what she has to say dont be on here trying to gett her to commit it again! she is my best friend in the hole wide world she took me in when i was living on the streets after my parents kikd me out at the age of 12 and i can tell you she is everything but fucking fake. She doesnt like attention whenever she does get some she leaves to a secluded place where no one else is. And if she really pissed you off that badly just remember the fucking golden rule dont say anything at all if you dont got something nice to say. and if my message isnt clear enough to you... DONT BE CALLING PPL FAKE IF U HAVE NO IDEA IN HELL WHAT THEY ARE GOING THROUGH AND JUST KEEP YOU MOUTH SHUT IF YOU DONT LIKE WHAT SHE SAID. She is my best friend in the world and i will be damned if im gonna let you talk shit about her like that. She is MY BEST FRIEND! and unless if you want me to flip out on ya again then dont be calling my savior a attention addict fake. If it wasnt for her i wuld be dead! she is everything but fake and if you culdnt see that then you are the fucking blind attention hungry addict not her! >
  i am a nice and easy person to get along with but as soon as you start to talk shit about MY BEST FRIEND then you really pissed me off and its hard to ever get onto my good side again
• ashlie cae woensdag 04 januari 2012 15:14
  i hate leaving nasty mean messages but as soon as you start in on my friends i swear to god i will fucking flip out. No one gets to talk shit about my friends NO ONE! lets see you be kikd off into the streets at the age i was see how much every friend you ever make is soo important to ya. then you will finally understand my logic and you will finally quit with your hipacracy nitpicking at others when they are down at the lowest they culd possibly ever get! i hope you take some advice from this learn a lesson and learn it well it will make you a better person and you will find true friends like i have and youll finally get your sense pf belongling in this world. >>(
• Ingrain (opgeheven op 13-9-2015) woensdag 04 januari 2012 15:33
  IF you'd been reading my post you'd UNDERSTAND why it's hard for me to believe this stuff. ESPECIALLY when I've been there myself.
  I GET YOUR POINT but try to get my fucking point as well: THEN WHY did she not just call you? Your explanation to this sounds even more lame. There is NO golden rule saying if I don't agree that I should shut up, dream on. Don't you DARE call me a attention whore, ESPECIALLY in this situation. IF YOU HAD ANY BRAINS you'd read on and see my comments don't only say it's HARD FOR ME TO BELIEVE THIS SHIT, but that NO boy or girl should make you feel this way. And that suicide is NOT an option. It might look like it is but it is not, it is selfish and stupid AND I KNOW THAT better than you, missy.
  Do I HONESTLY have to quote myself? FINE! here it comes:
  
  1st: But I will never, EVER, believe death is the better option, again. No boy
  or girl is worth taking your life for. Even if you think so now, I'm sorry
  to be harsh, but, come on
  
  SECOND: HE chose someone else, well, let him have
  that girl, find that she's not enough for him, let him cheat, destroy
  everything, and come back crying. Then it is your turn to block him,
  delete his name and call him a freaking idiot for not taking you when
  he could.
  
  
  And now this: YOU do not own me. This being real or not. It makes me PISSED when it's not, and if it wasn't you'd be PISSED as well. So in that light, I give my excuses for saying I'm not believing it. BUT! I still feel the same about the situation APARt from the real or not thing. SUICIDE is NOT something to think lightly of, NOT to be experimented with. If she WANTED to die she would not have put it on the net, that's human LOGIC.
  So, she did NOT want to kill herself, and that's why I'm giving her the virtual SLAP in the face. IF YOU ARE HER FRIEND you let her know as soon as she is able to listen, to NEVER do this again. If I have to actually come over, slap her, and MAKE HER FUCKING UNDERSTAND that this is RETARDED, just so she'll STOP THIS SHIT, I will, but what kind of friend does it make you if you don't do it yourself, ey?
  
  
  YOU have no idea what others are going through either. And WE on mydi have seen to many people making a hoax out of suicide and others, so you SHUT your mouth if you can't understand people [NOT ONLY ME, just that I'm the only one reacting to this] having a lot of difficulty with BELIEVING this. For the moment, I've apologized, but it doesn't change my statement.
  
  You don't seem like any "nice and easy person" the way you reacted yourself, so stick it up where the sun doesn't shine. I don't care if you like me or that I'm not at your good side, cause you're not at my good side either.
  NOW, back to where this was about: YOU tell her to stop this idiotic behaviour. And YES that includes suïcide, ANd trying to do so. YOU tell her to stop, MAKE her stop. And You yourself, stop reading ONLY what you want to read, else, what are you doing on a dutch multilanguage site with a lot of people who have been there, have lost people like this, or are at the brink of doing it themselves.
  
  LAST TIME: if she ACTUALLY WANTED to kill herself she would not have left a note. You came to save her, now, did you not? Do you even know what the mind of a suicidal person is like? When they leave a note like this they WANT to be saved. Another case of HUMAN LOGIC.
  
  And if you're still gonna behave like this, fine, but then I guess it's time for me to go back talking to grown ups instead of girls in puberty. And THAT is the case, puberty, it MESSES with your head, especially when you're in love. But NOTHING, not love, not friendship, not heartbreak, is worth killing yourself over. Get off your high horse and OPEN YOUR EYES.
  
  
  Honestly.
• ashlie cae woensdag 04 januari 2012 16:04
  wow if im on a high horse then why the fuck am i sitin here waiting for my friend to wake up? oh wait a min everything is fucking fake to you...wen will you learn you snotty cock juggling thunder cunt not everyone is the fucking same!!!! and i swear to god if you ever say that suicides not a fucking option then you are so fucking dead WRONG! If suicides not an option then why is everyone fucking commiting it?! it may not be to you so just get off your fucking pedistel and get your fucking facts right before you go and bad mouth my friend when shes at her lowest point shes ever been at you dumb bitch! you dont no jack shit about anything so you might wanta shut the fuck up before u end up looking like a fucking bimbo even more bitch....and if you have to restate and quote yourself you have no fucking life! you talk about me talking fucking escuses look at your life its a escuse! i mean really get a mother fucking life and stop nitpicking at others lifes. And there is a fucking golden rule if you have fucking manners i was raised on the fucking streets and i no more then you culd ever no i have fucking manners after being jumped and beaten on the streets were your mommy and daddy arent there to save ya and everyone is there to fucking mugg you or kill ya. Thats
  pretty damn bad if i got kikd out on the streets and learned more about manners than you culd ever dream of i got beat every fucking day of my life dont try and fucking pity party me you dumbass cunt sucker. All i gotta say is FUCK OFF YOU DUMBASS WHORE >:0
• ashlie cae woensdag 04 januari 2012 16:06
  wow if im on a high horse then why the fuck am i sitin here waiting for my friend to wake up? oh wait a min everything is fucking fake to you...wen will you learn you snotty cock juggling thunder cunt not everyone is the fucking same!!!! and i swear to god if you ever say that suicides not a fucking option then you are so fucking dead WRONG! If suicides not an option then why is everyone fucking commiting it?! it may not be to you so just get off your fucking pedistel and get your fucking facts right before you go and bad mouth my friend when shes at her lowest point shes ever been at you dumb bitch! you dont no jack shit about anything so you might wanta shut the fuck up before u end up looking like a fucking bimbo even more bitch....and if you have to restate and quote yourself you have no fucking life! you talk about me talking fucking escuses look at your life its a escuse! i mean really get a mother fucking life and stop nitpicking at others lifes. And there is a fucking golden rule if you have fucking manners i was raised on the fucking streets and i no more then you culd ever no i have fucking manners after being jumped and beaten on the streets were your mommy and daddy arent there to save ya and everyone is there to fucking mugg you or kill ya. Thats
  pretty damn bad if i got kikd out on the streets and learned more about manners than you culd ever dream of i got beat every fucking day of my life dont try and fucking pity party me you dumbass cunt sucker. All i gotta say is FUCK OFF YOU DUMBASS WHORE >:0
• Ingrain (opgeheven op 13-9-2015) woensdag 04 januari 2012 16:16
  You really only read what you want to read. You have a pm.
  Right now, your emotions are too high to understand what I'm actually saying, obviously, which is a shame. There's no need to call me a whore or a cunt or anything like that, if you had those manners, you would not use those words, thanks very much. At least read the Pm's and TRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to be a normal person.
  
  I shall leave the swearing on the sideline, and will try it one last time.
  NO, suicide is not an option. So, you don't see peoples gazes and everything, and I'm not pretending to know everything so forget that, but at the same time, it's your LIFE. Suicide IS an easy way out, for most. for some, it may come as a relief, but I can't believe theres anything in the world that is worth taking your life for. All you do in the end, is hurt a lot of people around you. Can you stop being like this? I understand what she did is hard on you, it would be so to anyone.
  
  you know, I'm not going to lower myself the way you've just done. Read my pm, I'm not the person you pretend I am, not in a long shot.
• ashlie cae woensdag 04 januari 2012 16:31
  im sorry i crossed the line im not gonna make an dumb excuse and blame it on jess for tryin to commit it. I was seeing red im sorry but you gotta understand i was dead on the streets in a week if she didnt come and save me off the streets. and i promised that i wuld make it up to her for it anyway anytime i wuld do it if i died tomoro i wuld stick around till i paid bak my debt. She is my best friend and my savior i learned in my short life that friends are something you never wanta lose thats why im so defensive when it comes to her. Im truely sorry for the use of so much slang. Honestly if i culd i wuld change it.

• O 04 jan 2012 the darknes consumes us all...but now death callin   ( 10 )
• O 04 jan 2012 Am i sick in the mind for believing in u? :(   ( 1 )
• O 04 jan 2012 can i kill myself now?! :''(   ( 2 )
• O 01 jan 2012 omgeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!! :d!   ( 1 )
• O 25 dec 2011 Make it through this :'(
• O 25 dec 2011 dontcha just fucking love family dumbasses?! :)
• O 23 dec 2011 fml! :'(   ( 3 )