the world that died

as i sit watching TV
i realize that i have trouble not crying
the pain is still there
i recall people and things that hurt
names that have been called
and just as many i have taken

today there was one who did not know me
i can not imagine that but it did not offend me

they knew me
from inside out
and i know it is impossible
but i loved her
impossible

they hated me
and now i think they have forgotten me
or did i forget them
these last few weeks in love
i did not think of them
untill tonight
this movie
i hate it
a dream it is
and my dream back then was true

they were right to hate me
i can not stand it
a lot of people may hate me
but she is the one i feel hurt by
and she did nothing i would not do in such situation

i must have been a nightmare come to life

in that year a world died
my heart broke
and i made the one fear me i never wanted to hurt
i ran
had to go far away

and every now and then i recall the times we spend
it is ever haunting
and she should know
i still care
some will still hate me

my girlfriend is cute
adorable
i love her so much
and it bothers me
that today she is on my mind
but also her
she who ment a world to me
and i destroyed a world
just to save her

i can not do such thing again
not with that confiction

i do love my girl
a lot !
i would die for her
go through the fires again
but i could not
destroy a world
or would i ?

i cry
for worlds dead and gone
love and heartbreak

she will never know me
and my girl she will have my love
but something stings

maybe a billion or so deaths

who counts ?
my love kills
and i fear that
she can bring that up again
she has that what triggers it

no one knows
when, cause it will happen
some one knows
i can not hold it back

the world that died can be revived
when love grows
and they know it does


my love
i am sorry for this shit

hey girl
never wanted to haunt you so i never died
afraid you might be scared
i killed a world
so you would live without fear
i try not to come close or near

though you do haunt me now
you haunt me still

i would like to talk
just to clear the worst
i am not half as bad as thought
as told by them
not than not now
i never was

there is a secret
we know
there is a secret
that we carry
that we know can change the world
if only

i know you think i am a ghost
maybe i am
i killed my world for you
cause i could not keep my promis
my promis was a paradox
was suicide