darkside of love

for all the love in the world i would not do it again
not go through that time like it was cool
not for all the love in the world i would fall and fail like that
but for you.

if it would make you smile
if it would make you laugh
if it would make you feel better
if it would bring you back to life
i'd go through it all again

torn within the fabric of my soul is a piece of paper with your name
and no one has ever seen it
no one has ever known
but they have seen the saddest eyes
they have seen my broken spirit
and never knew
it was because of you
and they never will

i can not remember your face
nor can i recall something real
just the memory
this memory i feel

many times i have told them what was the reason
many times i tried to explain
the moment of decay
the time i went insane
and you were the only one
you were real to me
like nothing else
and i never got a chance
to say i am sorry
and so many times i did
so many times i tried
and you did not listen
cause this has been done before
there is nothing new here

i thought i could change it all
the last time i did it all over again
i thought i could make it all
but you knew better
not to be near
when i fall

i listen to the songs again
and i have my memories of you
just the feelings
and nothing changed
nothing is new

most every day i think of you
and most every day i think of dying
but i would be lying
if only you could hear me crying

tears are dry and burn my eyes
sad is my heart which hopes to die
maybe tomorrow
maybe next week
you will never know
cause we never speak

i hope my gift has gotten to you
i hope you know what to do
cause i can't use it
don't abuse it
please don't refuse it
maybe just bruse it

it's a worthless gift
it is nothing special
it is just a waste
it leaves a bad taste
i hope you are free
for i gave you
the life that was in me

hush my precious
hush my special one
i hope you have forgotten me
i hope you have your life with fun

i could never be
what you wanted
what you desired
what you need
i could never be
anything real.

forget me quick
for i will never forget you
torn the fabric of my soul
to give a piece to you
i gave you ten more years
i've lived in fear
i've lived so close
so near
and always far away
enjoy life
enjoy the brightest day
i can never give things like that
so i'll stay away.

i've done this over and over again
you must have known
hope it did not hurt
all the things i've shown

maybe you are right
maybe i was and am
nothing real
nothing at all.