Dreaming

When I met the man with whom I had a relationship that was the healthiest I have had, that was heading towards health before he made a bad decision or two that spiralled him right back to depression...

I was content on my own.

I made a list that was filled with so many criteria I thought I was set to remain single for the duration of my university studies. My concept for this list was:

"If I am going to spend another minute on a man instead of my ambitions and fun things and family and friends, he has to be this amazing."

I moved from a place of abundance, not scarcity.

I was so convinced of my bulletproof plan to remain single for a couple of years at least. Then I saw him.

We met at a place where people gathered with mutual interests. My pleading association. Pleitvereniging.

We talked a bunch there, we chatted and e-mailed before he offered to have a coffee.

Circumstances led it to be a drink at this lovely little bar.

We talked and laughed for hours. I fell in love for the first time.

I wanted to kiss him but it had to be at a beautiful location, so I made him walk on his formal shoes over cobble stones for a while until I found the perfect spot.

At that point I was letting him talk, gathering courage before I pulled him by his tie.

I allowed myself to be the romantic I am always afraid to let show.

It was the first person I kissed where sparks flew. Where the world stopped and I wasn't thinking. We were one.

People who knew him for longer shared how he smiled for the first time in a while. How he smiled when I was mentioned unlike any other time.
26 mei 2023 - meld ongepast verhaal
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Profielfoto van knowthyself
knowthyself, vrouw, 30 jaar
   
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