Just another day...
It is impossible to live in this harsh cruel world.
Writing is the only thing i can do for not becoming insane.
I feel so small in this world full of injustice.
They kick me down and walk all over me.
But i am far too weak for stopping them.
I just try to think that life goes on.
There is no other possibility.
I have to go to school.
Hours of staring out the window and let my thoughts go other ways then the school lessons.
And waiting, always waiting until i can go home to feel more miserable than i already was.
Then stacks of homework and endless long study
and after that exhausting to move in bed and pray that my mind just want to stand still,
so i can finally sleep.
That's my life. My ordinary life. My life every day.
And still i hope that it ends. That i don't have to fight no more.
That i can love myself again, as i am, as i really am.
Because now i feel so disappointed.
Because they do not want to see me for who i am and trying to change me in their dream doll.
But i'm tired. Endless tired. I would no longer be lived by others.
I want to live my own life!
Writing is the only thing i can do for not becoming insane.
I feel so small in this world full of injustice.
They kick me down and walk all over me.
But i am far too weak for stopping them.
I just try to think that life goes on.
There is no other possibility.
I have to go to school.
Hours of staring out the window and let my thoughts go other ways then the school lessons.
And waiting, always waiting until i can go home to feel more miserable than i already was.
Then stacks of homework and endless long study
and after that exhausting to move in bed and pray that my mind just want to stand still,
so i can finally sleep.
That's my life. My ordinary life. My life every day.
And still i hope that it ends. That i don't have to fight no more.
That i can love myself again, as i am, as i really am.
Because now i feel so disappointed.
Because they do not want to see me for who i am and trying to change me in their dream doll.
But i'm tired. Endless tired. I would no longer be lived by others.
I want to live my own life!
24 mrt 2009
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