What I've missed

My dad is "always there" for me but never there. My mom and dad divorced when I was 6 and then I moved and now I only see my dad six weeks of the entire year. Perfect split, right? 46 weeks-6 weeks. Sometimes I wonder why my dad never visits, why my mom spent half my life raising me herself. I mean I never had the chance for father daughter days or to be a daddy's girl. I feel like I spent two years with my dad before then I can't remember anything. And I just miss him. Sometimes I will still cry, as I am doing now, huddled up in my blanket wishing my dad would text saying he's coming. But no. He canceled his spring visit. Because of "financial problems". I have enough family dealing with financial problems. In fact now I consider my whole family in financial problems. I wish I could grow up knowing there's a fund for my car. And college. But no. I have to get financial aid or a full scholarship. My one wish for when I have my own family is for them never to be teased for far too small clothes and to never have food stamps. I'm tired of worrying that eventually someone will find out that I have a scholarship for every field trip we take or that I'm qualified for free cafeteria lunch. That they'll find out the majority of my clothes are hand me downs. But I still haven't found anyone who is in the same situation as I. The only 3 people I have told these secrets to, I have known for 3+ years and would never tell. Bleh sometimes you don't want to tell secrets. Sometimes you want to show the world the true you. Not the hidden you.
-O
22 feb 2012 - meld ongepast verhaal
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Profielfoto van Paris8543
Paris8543, vrouw, 26 jaar
   
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